As a mum and early years educator navigating the joys and challenges of raising two young children, I recently delved into Dr. Laura Markham’s insightful book, Peaceful Parent, Happy Siblings. There were many takeaways for me in this book, but my favourite has been the impact of implementing weekly family meetings.
Now, don’t confuse this with your boring office-type meeting; this is a FUN meeting, and for us, it has been a game-changer. We’re better connected, resolve conflicts more calmly, are watching our children problem-solve, and my favourite part; are strengthening our bonds, understanding, and appreciation of each other.
Time for a family meeting
So, how do you kickstart this invaluable ritual? Here’s a concise roadmap modelled on Dr. Laura’s advice:
1. Set the Stage
Introduce the concept to your kids in a positive, engaging manner. Start with a festive snack and keep it short and fun. We have made it our Sunday night dinner tradition (one I hope will last until the kids are adults!) and it’s the one night of the week we serve dessert.
2. Consistency is Key
Schedule meetings at the same time each week, making it a non-negotiable part of your routine.
3. Create Rituals
Establish traditions that signal the start of the meeting, such as holding hands or a brief blessing. In our family, we light a candle at the beginning of this special dinner.
Time for the meeting
Now here is where the icon cards we have made come in. Lay them out in this order and turn a card over once it is finished.
Appreciations
Kick-off each meeting by expressing gratitude for each family member. It sets a positive tone and strengthens bonds. E.g. This week I really appreciated how beautifully O played independently while I helped E with his drum homework.
Address Concerns
Provide a safe space for family members to raise any issues, problems or conflicts. Use ground rules for constructive discussions. Laura advises here that parents never single out a child here. Siblings may, but parents must not; instead, keep it general. For example: “It’s taking too long for everyone to get dressed and ready for school this week.” From there we brain-storm as a family how we can fix the issue.
My children also use this time to workshop solutions to problem’s their having. Eg. Friendship troubles at Kindergarten.
We make a point of letting the children find solutions first, before jumping in with answers or advice.
Look Forward
Encourage everyone to share something they’re excited about for the upcoming week, or month, fostering optimism and unity.
Celebrate Achievements
Take a moment to acknowledge and celebrate a family member’s accomplishments, big or small. Not everyone needs to be celebrated every week. This is about acknowledging milestones and recognising them as a family.
Make Announcements
Wrap up with practical reminders and logistics. For this part, I’ve found having our calendar beside me helpful for a quick run-through of what our week will look like.
End on a High Note
Seal the meeting with a group hug and your family motto, reinforcing unity and love. For us, we like to place our hands in the middle for a sporting ‘FAM….BAM!’ close.
Here is what each icon represents:
Appreciation (heart)
Listening to problems (ear)
Looking forward to’s (smile)
Recognizing family members’ achievements (celebrate)
Announcements (speaker)
Closing the meeting (hand)
I’ve found these icons keep our meeting on track and engage my young children who are visual learners. Download them below.
May your family find Family Meetings as rewarding as our family does. Enjoy!
Louise xx
